Hemlock Grove S:1 E:3 "The Order Of the Dragon"

Last Time on Hemlock Grove : Roman and Peter bonded over Peter becoming a werewolf. There was a costume party, Olivia fucked her brother in law, and a chick says an angel impregnated her. So really just a normal day in the neighborhood.

This Time on Hemlock Grove :

Um, not much happened. Roman and Peter dealt with the aftermath of Peter's turning by gazing longingly at each other. They apparently have the "same dreams." Which Peter uses to justify his allowing Roman to see him change to his cousin or something (everyone seems like a "cousin" on this show. It's like West Virginia.).

The "can't bring herself to be slutty future novelist" is wandering in the woods and finds another body. It's ripped to shreds, much like the first body found. Sadly, no play houses were involved, just a hole in the ground, and before you ask, no it's not a Hobbit hole. Apparently two murders are too much for the local cops to handle so Mulder and Scully, sorry, Dr. Clementine Chausser, shows up. She does not work for the X-Files, but rather the Fish and Game Commission or some reasonable facsimile of. The police aren't too happy about the help but she schools them with her expert tracking abilities and freaky looking eyes (Red Herring!).

They pull up to question Peter just as he and his mother are planning to skip town. Apparently our little novelist friend fingered him as a werewolf based upon the length of his fingers (again with the fingers?). That, and the packed car make him look all kinds of guilty. But he uses his shirtless "awe shucks" charm that only works in Hollywood to talk his way out of it. Dr. Chausser isn't entirely convinced, but I'm not entirely convinced that that's her real eye color, so suspicions all around. Needless to say, Peter and his mom are staying. Which makes sense since the series is about him and having him leave now would be, well, stupid.

Peter also thinks Roman is some sort of Uum-something or other. Whether that's another type of wolf or something completely different remains to be seen. Either way I find it hard to really give a shit.

That's really all that happened this week. A lot of talking and a couple other "let's throw in something shocking" type of moments. But a couple faux lesbian scenes and threesome tease, really served no purpose in the narrative other than to make your wife say "Now I know why you watch this show."

Episode three was a big regression as far as quality. The last show was at least about something. While not spectacular, it seemed to be moving in the right direction. Now, in show #3, we are stuck in neutral. This does not bode well moving forward. There are about 5 or 6 story lines going at any one time in this show and this episode did almost nothing to advance any of them.  Episode 4 better mean something to the progression of the series or I may have to call it quits and move out of "Hemlock Grove."

Keep Reading - Episode 4!

1 comment:

  1. Since you're practically the only one reviewing Hemlock Groove episodes,I'm back to read if I had fallen asleep and missed something this episode.Not even a bloody pussy being eaten out in the good old washroom.........we used to smoke in ours when I went to High School.